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SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS!!

 

Well I went to School today October 18,2007 and spoke to your class and thought I could do it with such composer but boy was I wrong. As I walked in the room filled with your classmates a total feeling of sadness came over me and I couldn't help it. I did the best I could. I couldn't even read what I had wrote because I couldn't see through the tears. As I looked at them all I could think of was you were suppose to be sitting out there somewhere and I wouldn't be doing this at all. But with the scholarship at risk I had to let them know about it so you could help one of them go to college. I know you would be proud of me no matter how bad I think I done but Babe I got up in front of your classmates and did the best I could.

Mama

 

 

April 15, 2008

Hey Babe,

Just thought I would let you know that I have been doing pretty good lately. I've been in a fairly good mood for about 4 weeks now. I have to say that it does feel good to feel good some time. I think about you all the time and still wonder why but I know there is no answer for me. I have your picture on my desk and a heart around my neck that i'm never witout that has your picture in it. A lot of stuff happening these days some good some sad. As Mother's day draws closer I try not to think about it but what is on my mind is graduation. I've tried not to think about it to much but it just keeps slipping in. I'm not looking forward to that night but I will be there no matter what. It was suppose to be one of the happiest days of my life seeing you walk. Remember I use to tell you that you were not going to deprive me of crying that night. Well rest assured I will be crying no matter how hard I try not to. So you just send me a sign because I know you willl be there with me. I love you son so much no-one can take that away from me. You were taken away from me but no one can take the love and memories from me. I love you and miss you so much every single day. Well I guess that's all for now. I love you,

I love you,

Mama

 

August 12, 2008

Hey Babe,

Just thought I would write you a little bit. Been thinking about school alot these days. I guess you would be starting college now bringing me a little down. I know you would probably be going to ole Miss and I would have to be a rebel fan. I know you would like that now wouldn't you. but I would have been the best ole miss fan alive if only you were here to be playing ball for them.  Alot of your friends are starting college this year and I can't help but think you would be leaving home and how I would handle it. I wouldn't have done so well probably but would have been better that this. But this is the card I was delt so I just think about what might have been and miss you so bad. so so bad I can't stand it most days. Getting that time of year you know and I worry bout how I'm going to handle it this year. Like all the rest I suppose just do it. I love you so much and miss you so bad. I wish you were here every single day that goes by. Not one minute that you don't cross my mind or might I say you never leave it. Anyway guess that's all for now I'll write soon. Of course you know I'm here everyday.

I love you Baby,

Mama

Mama April 14, 2014
 
Every thing I thought was true
Hey Christopher,
Total meltdown this week end.  Sorry babe but I had processed the night you went away and now i have to reprocess everything over again.  8 years later and what i had come to grips with has just went out the window.  been a rough weekend to say the least.  I love you and miss you so so very bad, and that will never change.  Some say i'm strong but that i think is an understatement.  but i have survived this long and I guess I will survive this as well...... Doesnt change anything just changes how i perceived  the way things happened.
Love you 4-ever and ever and ever. you have my heart as broken as it is, it is with you!!!!
Mama
Patsy Thomas April 28, 2012
 
running into an old class mate.
Hey Christopher,
I ran into one of your school mates today.  He didn't know who I was till I told him and I can tell you that he still holds you dear to his heart from what I seen.  It made me feel so proud to be your mama once again as I see how you touched lives while  you were here and years later as well.  He wrote a poem about you and I have his permission to post it on here.  I know you were with me last night when we were talking.  Still loved and never ever ever forgotten.
I love you Babe.
Mama
melanie November 25, 2010
 
hurt

well christopher, friday was your passing anniversary. in honor of the day and of you, i got something permanent. More permanent than missing you. More permanent than the ache that seems to be slowly fading. In your honor i have a 74 with a halo and wings forever on my back. I told the man that put the tattoo there, " He's giving me hell when he's not even here." I said this with a smile on my face. A tattoo was the only thing that could touch the actual pain of missing you. Even numerous amounts of needles being drug across my skin couldnt mask what my chest was feeling. I dont know why im writing this on a website you will never read. I know i can talk to you any time i feel the need to. I write you this because i love and miss you. Wish you could've been there because i was making some crazy faces. Tell Paw Paw i said hey and i love him.

love,

sasquatch

Mama September 13, 2008
 
Birthday

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Christopher I'll take this as a sign from you this moring. On the way to your resting place the fire truck got behind me and I had to pull over to let them by and they went right by to to get to where they were going. I took that as Hey Mama I see you and I'm here and then as I was sitting there a hummingbird flew right up to me and looked like he was just looking at me. May be all in my head but i took it as a sign from you on this day the happiest day of life.................................... Just wish you were here with me. I will always love you and miss you. You have my heart and no-one else can touch it. I love you Baby..................

Mama

Linda Lewis September 1, 2008
 
Christopher,I know you are with J.R. I hope y'all are saving a special place for your mom and me.We love both of you and miss you too! Don't start the party without us.See y'all soon.
Gayla September 1, 2008
 
We miss you sweetie. Mama is fine. We are watching out for her. She really misses you. John misses you. He has your picture in his room. See you soon. We love you.
Mama April 4, 2008
 
Prom Night

Hey babe,

I found out today that this saturday night is your senior prom night. I guess you know that though. I so wish you were here to get all dressed up and so i could rent a limo for you and your friends. All the things that you missed out as I did. I know they will all have a good time and yes some of them will have you in their hearts. I know you probably would be the life of the party if you went and I'm sure you would. As always I'm thinking of you every minute of every day. Graduation is slowly sneaking up on me and I'll be there, wouldn't miss for anything.

I love you Babe,

Mama

Mama February 18, 2008
 
Valentines

Hey Christopher,

Just wanted to tell you what I done on Valentines figured you'd get a kick out of it. I went in the grocery story after work and just as I was checking out and noticed they had balloons and I bought one and the girl behind the counter wanted to know if I wanted one blew up a little more. I told her no I was just going to let it go when I got outside. She looked at me so strange but when I got outside I just looked up as said "Happy Valentines Christopher" and I let it go. Hope you saw it. You know it straight toward Highway 41 which was a little strange but fitting I guess. Anyway thought you would get a kick out of that. I'm sure she though I was a little strange to buy a baloon and just let it go. But that's what I felt I needed to do at that moment.

I love you son.

now and for always,

Mama

Mama February 14, 2008
 
Valentines

Hey Babe, tomorrow is valentines and its a time for hearts and flowers but my heart is broken and the flowers are dead. I do not like any holidays anymore they are just so empy and painful. I hope someday they will get better but for the day of love and hearts and flowers  well the thing is that you have my heart with you and that's where it always will be. Happy Valentines Babe I love you so much and miss you so bad and that willnever change.

I love you,

Mama

Ashley Laken Brooks November 21, 2007
 
if you could only be here once again

Well I was just settin here lookin at my cell phone thinkin about all the times you took my phone and hide it and then had me lookin crazy trien to find it then would call it Well i just wish you could do it once again Christopher i misss the good times we had You know i cant even remember us ever being mad at each other i mean really mad maybe pretending but never mad you always made me happy you where the best friend i could ever ask for and the big brother i never had I LOVE YOU CHRISTOPHER NEIL THOMAS ( Big BRO )


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